The Messy Middle

February 2023

I love the beginning. It’s the middle I hate.

The beginning of a painting is always thrilling with big bursts of color and energy.  I get so excited about the shapes and forms that appear.  Splashing paint around, playing with composition - it’s all sunshine and roses. I’m falling in love.  But alas, it’s too soon.

Something has shifted.  The road has taken a turn and I am lost in a muddle of disparate shapes and competing colors.  Ugh!  How do I find my way out of this mess?  I have learned that this is part of the process. I take a break and come back with  fresh eyes.  Decisiveness is not my strong suit and yet, that is what is needed.  Does this shape stay or that one?  Does the piece need more contrast or cohesiveness?  What colors are needed to help pull this together?  And, can I somehow keep this little section I love even though it isn’t contributing to the overall piece?  (Sadly, the answer is almost always no).

I make some decisions and little by little work my way toward clarity.  Sometimes this happens quickly - one decisive brush stroke and things start to come together.  But other times it’s a real slog. I am out wading in the mud for days not knowing which way to go.  I want a clear direction but the painting isn’t telling me which way to turn.  I’ve got to trudge ahead one step at a time - just like life.  I reflect back on my intention.  What is the feeling that I wanted to convey in the piece?  What inspired me initially to start the painting?  And slowly but surely if I stick with it I’m out of the mud and I can begin to feel dry land under my feet.  Phew!  Back to the fun and excitement of the work.